In Defense of Elder Packer

There has been an uproar from many people in regards to Elder Packer's talk that was given in conference. It has been a bit surprising, yet when someone takes a position as clear as Elder Packer, some are bound to be offended.

Let me start out by saying that while I don't agree with the lifestyle of the homosexual community, I don't have any hateful or unkind feelings towards them as human beings, the only issue I have is with their reactions to a differing belief. Somehow it feels a bit unfair that they demand acceptance without returning it and then attempt to force Elder Packer and the Church to alter doctrine just because it doesn't condone their lifestyle. That seems unfair. I realize that this is not something these people take lightly and they have many deep feelings. I also realize that they want to be accepted and to have self-worth. It was a hard thing to say what Elder Packer said, but I believe what he said was correct. Let me step away from feelings for just a little bit and approach the subject with a little logic.

First of all, Elder Packer believes in God. The God Elder Packer and I believe in has a plan for his children. That plan that we believe and accept revolves around the idea that we are here on earth to be tested. That plan also includes that we are to raise families and have children. The temple is for the sealing of families and the progression of humanity through eternity. That is it. That is what we believe.

So my question is, as an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ and as a man who has an abiding testimony and belief in this plan, a belief so strong that he was willing to accept the call as an Apostle and give the rest of his life for that cause, how could he say anything else than he said? Had he done so he would have been denying his testimony. A person who believes this plan cannot speak for anything that would not encourage people to move closer to the realization of this plan which includes being sealed in the temple and having posterity. To teach otherwise would be to show a misunderstanding of a core doctrine of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

It is not hateful, it is not mean-spirited. Yes, Elder Packer was blunt, but he did not say anything that was out of line with what he believed is central to the plan of salvation we believe in as members of the Church. Also, we believe that plan applies to all people on the earth. How could Elder Packer support a lifestyle that will ultimately lead away from this goal? It is illogical and in opposition to who he is.

There is a lot of talk about being true to oneself. If I disagree, I don't have to be disagreeable. All people deserve love and respect. It is claimed that there is nothing some one can do who has homosexual attractions. This is a relinquishing of agency and will-power. There are people who claim biology. We are what we think and choose to believe.

My belief tells me that people are "free to choose". This is not limited. We are free "according to the flesh" (2 Nephi 2:27). We have agency. We can decide what we become. "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he" (Proverbs 23:7). I cannot accept the argument of "that is just how I am". I spend my days teaching that we are in control of our lives. Just because a thought enters our mind doesn't mean it is true. Just because a desire or attraction comes into our mind or heart doesn't mean we have to entertain it or start to believe it. I think that sometimes we have a thought enter our mind that frightens us, in regards to any subject, and we are afraid of it, then we panic and fight against it. The more time we spend fighting it the more tired we come. I have learned to stop fighting the thought and after analyzing it for true or false, worthwhile or worthless, I can either simply dismiss it or accept it if it passes for truth. I have found that lies that enter are based in fear and darkness. Truths always promote courage, freedom and light.

So, in essence. I agree with Elder Packer. I agree one-hundred percent. Not just because I trust him as a leader, but because after debating the issue in my mind and struggling with where to stand for the past 15 years, because of my personal relationship with people struggling with homosexuality, whom I care about, and based on my belief in God, who loves all His children, but has set up a plan that requires family: husband, wife, and children relationships, my conclusion is that God needs families to get his children back home. Nothing else makes sense. I also believe in the power of the mind to shape a person. I believe that people are malleable and adaptable and can change. To think otherwise for me would be to deny a basic part of what make me human.

This is a sensitive topic in the world, if you disagree with me for whatever reason, that is fine. Just don't think that because I believe differently with all my heart that I am cold and insensitive. Don't call me names. Don't believe that I am full of hate and spite, because that is not true. I care about what people go through and struggle with. I care about the pain they feel because they don't think they belong. I believe the pain is real. I also believe in a Savior who helps people change.

Yes, I believe homosexuality is a temptation, I know that offends some people, that is not my intent. My intent is to state my belief that WE are in charge of who we are and that just because something came into my mind, or just because my body desires something, doesn't mean I have to submit to it. Many of the things that enter our minds any given day are not true. It is the things we are afraid of that we give too much credence to until they find a place to take up residence. I would say, don't be afraid of a thought. Examine, decide whether it is worthwhile or not then move forward. Hand to the rod, eyes on the goal.

Elder Packer's talk stirred up much controversy, but I believe his intent was to give hope to people who feel like this is a struggle. Perhaps he wanted to give hope to people who want to change.

If you're curious here is the link to Elder Packer's talk: http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1298-23,00.html

If you read the whole thing you will realize that Elder Packer is concerned and is trying to help. To quote part of his talk:

"Every soul confined in a prison of sin, guilt, or perversion has a key to the gate. The key is labeled “repentance.” If you know how to use this key, the adversary cannot hold you. The twin principles of repentance and forgiveness exceed in strength the awesome power of the tempter. If you are bound by a habit or an addiction that is unworthy, you must stop conduct that is harmful. Angels will coach you, and priesthood leaders will guide you through those difficult times."

"Nowhere are the generosity and the kindness and mercy of God more manifest than in repentance. Do you understand the consummate cleansing power of the Atonement made by the Son of God, our Savior, our Redeemer? He said, “I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent.” In that supernal act of love, the Savior paid the penalties for our sins so that we might not have to pay."...

"Strangely enough, it may be that the simplest and most powerful prevention and cure for pornography, or any unclean act, is to ignore and avoid it. Delete from the mind any unworthy thought that tries to take root. Once you have decided to remain clean, you are asserting your God-given agency. And then, as President Smith counseled, “Don’t look back.”"

"I promise that ahead of you is peace and happiness for you and your family. The ultimate end of all activity in the Church is that a man and his wife and their children can be happy at home. And I invoke the blessings of the Lord upon you who are struggling against this terrible plague, to find the healing that is available to us in the priesthood of the Lord. I bear witness of that power in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen." (Elder Boyd K. Packer, October Conference 2010)

Sleepless Night

It is 1:46 a.m. My mind is running full tilt. What is going through it you may ask? Well, it seems like everything. Worries. Money. Classes. Family. Jenna and the kids. Scouts. The Ward Mission. School. People.

I think many of us wonder how it's all going to wind up at different times. This is one of those times for us. My going to school again has been incredible for my career, but it has put a strain on our finances at times and also the time I can spend with family with out knowing I need to get some homework done. I love going and feel that I am doing really well. I know it is an essential part of my families future and will reap long term dividends, but getting through the sacrifice is where the mettle is tested. We will get through. I have a commitment issue. Meaning that once I commit, I will do it. It may take me a while to commit, but once I have, my mind is set and it consumes me in a way. I don't think this is bad when kept in check. In fact with many areas it has helped me to accomplish much of what I have.

The timeline of everything is really good. I am young in my career, my family is young, and we have a bright future. I am grateful to the Lord for this. I know his ways are higher than I can understand. I feel that I am learning a lot from this process. I am managing my time better. I am accomplishing more. It feels good. I feel my ability to reason increase and my relationships with people improve. I would recommend that all people find a goal for self improvement and work diligently on it. It adds direction and vision. Even though I teach, I had forgotten how good it feels to learn, not just for the sake of "passing a class" but because I feel my spirit increasing in knowledge and I am able to comprehend better the world around me and see it for what it is.

If you think I think that I am all of a sudden "amazing", this is not the case, in fact I see more of my personal issues, but I want to keep "moving forward" as stated in Disney's movie, "Meet the Robinsons".

The principle, I believe is that if we will set a goal and counsel with the Lord about it (Alma 37:37), He "will direct thy paths" for good (Proverbs 3:5-6). It takes faith and desire. I did not always have the desire for more education. I was burned out for a while. I may be a bit burned out after all this is over, but I hope now I know better than to just be "done".

With any goal or assignment in life that we have we need to remember that is it for our good and that God will show us a goodly way to get there. In our callings, careers, and families this scripture of D&C 123:17 applies: Therefore dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed (emphasis added).

I need that assurance.

My Girl

Jenna Marie. I am so glad we are married! I met Jenna 6 years ago at SUU while we were at a HOPE choir meeting. I had been in the choir for 4 years and Jenna was just looking into it. I noticed her right off. How could I not. I found out she was much younger than I, and got a bit "freaked" out by that. We became choreography partners and the rest as they say is history.

We have been married five years now. Things are much more interesting, good, and crazy than I ever thought they would be. I am so thankful I didn't listen to fear and went forward to marry this incredible girl.

As five years and counting come and go we have learned a lot about each other. Most has been enjoyable. She has put up with me at times and I have had to learn to be patient with her we aren't always perfect, though she is much more so than I am.

With children we have had to adjust to being pulled in many directions. At times it has been hard just to get a few minutes together. But every time we do get away and go on a date I remember how much I love this girl and how beautiful she is. I also love that we laugh and we laugh a lot.I think five years must be a frazzle point for us, children, jobs, activities, community and church involvement, and who knows what else, sickness, health, anything it seems like. I am grateful for a partner who loves me. Who not only loves me, but at times just simply puts up with me. That is marriage. We are in this together, we know what we want, and where we want to end up.
I am so glad to be blessed with Jenna. It is amazing the range of emotion that a person can feel for another: ups and downs, but I am glad it is her. I feel like I am always learning something new about her and from her. She keeps me surprised! She is always faithful and caring. She is busy and motivated. She is beautiful and simple. She is happy. She is my wife and she is everything I ever wanted and she will be everything I will ever want. The Lord really put me out of my league when he put us together! I am thankful that He did.

Feeling about People.

I really do mean feeling with no 's'. Life seems to move at a pretty fast pace these days. Even during the summer when the days are supposed to be longer and lazier it seems that there is hardly time to breathe. One thing that does happen is there is plenty of time to think about many people in my life. Many questions go through my head when I think about past times, have someone brought to memory by Facebook, or reading back in my journals I have kept faithfully (mostly!) for the past 12 years or so. There are a lot of people in this world and we are connected to them in many ways.

I am going to say right here and now that I am with my favorite people always. I have Jenna. I have Dallin, and I have Allison. They are the people I care about the most. We are sealed. Yet, there are others who have come and gone. Some are doing well. They are living as they know best, they are happy blessing the lives of other people and raising their families. They are involved in the Gospel and their communities. They are daily improving themselves. They are the people who resist the temptations to be less than what God needs them to be, they stay strong even when winds of hell whip at their door and beat on their walls. This is the group of people I want to be classified in. Always.

Some of these people I love are not doing so well. I find it interesting that these former associates, many of whom were daily or weekly, have struggled. They are not bad people, but things have happened. They have let them happened. They have had things happen to them and let it get to them. They have opted for another life. They have not become all they could be.

Both types of people are deeply cared about by myself. Why? Sometimes I don't understand it, but I think it has something to do with charity.

Why do I ache when I hear that someone I care about, even who may be far removed time-wise from my life, is struggling. I feel especially for those who have to endure and endure well despite what has happened to them through the choices of others they love. I think of parents and spouses, children and neighbors who have to deal with life's struggles and the consequences of sin. Not all of these struggles are self-inflicted. I know I have felt much pain in my life over what other people do, especially when at one time they were on the "straight and narrow". Obviously Lehi's dream comes into my mind. The rod. The mists. The filthy water. For those who endure the Love of God, or the fruit.

Laman. Lemuel. They had a chance, but never really embraced the love of God. They were probably even baptized. Others in the dream tasted, knew, and then fell away. And of course, others tasted and stayed.

Why do I care? Why do we care?

It must have something to do with who we are. We are children of God. We chose sides a long time ago. Perhaps it is natural for us to feel a bit betrayed when someone "leaves the team".

It is difficult to watch as families succumb, marriages crumble, and contention escalates.

I have to remember as these things are happening around me, that no one is really safe UNLESS, they are daily fortifying themselves.

Okay. So this is getting a bit depressing. I definitely have a positive outlook on life. For myself. For my family. For those around me.

This stems a little bit from my mission. Many people I knew, and I mean many, have had hard times since the 12 years I have been home. Twelve years is a lot of time and a lot can happen. A lot has happened, and when I find out about it. It kind of hurts. For all I know many of these people hardly think about me, IF they can remember me! But I remember them and I hate to see the hardships they have to go through self inflicted or not.

This carries to family and others I knew in high school and college, served with in callings, and just acquaintances. None of us are exempt from hard times, that is part of our testing, but I believe our hard times can be minimized by keeping a tight, tight grip on the "iron rod".

I wondered for a while after I was married and away from the institute "bubble of protection" how I was going to stay good and true to what I believe. There is so much opposition to values, morals, and anything good.

The answer came pretty easily: Daily prayer. Daily scriptures. My patriarchal blessing adds, "if you are faithful in duty and responsibility you will overcome the tempting powers of the adversary."

Simple. But these things need to be done every. single. day.

Perhaps I am feeling a bit more needy with the Lord right now. I was just called to be the Ward Mission Leader in our ward. If I have learned anything about missionary work it is that I can work, help other people, serve, and testify, but the harvest is still in the Lord's hands. It's kind of a helpless calling. With other callings, I teach my lesson, I hometeach, I help the elderly, etc. With this one, I seek to bless others lives, but the decision is someone else's for improvement. God can soften hearts, lead people to missionaries, and open doors. But, he does not choose for us, and we can not choose for them either. Perhaps this is part of my feeling of frustration and sadness at the choices of others when they are making obviously unwise decisions in a moment of blindness due to desire, temptation, or loss of faith and hope.

Regardless. I know God lives. I have made my commitment to Him. I am kind of weak. Okay, really weak, but I know in whom I trust. I hope I keep it up. The alternative is so dark to me. The peace and joy I have in my own personal life and the blessings we enjoy are because of what we have chosen as a family. We can stay on the path. We have to work at it. Together.

The same goes for all the happy people I know. They do the little things. They listen to the Spirit, they make course corrections when needed. It is so simple, yet if we become "slothful" because of the easiness of the way...we fall. And many fall hard.

I hope that we can help others keep on the "path". I hope we can help some get back on, and I hope that those who stray can awaken.

Are the promises of God real? They are. More real than anything else we experience in this life. They are worth having faith in and trying to believe and follow. That's what I know.

Lastly, I wanted to share this video I watched this morning from Elder Uchtdorf, it is very powerful.

Playing into the Devil's Hand

(Don't worry, it's water in the picture!)
I realize the title for my post is kind of interesting. Even to me. But I think it describes what I have been thinking about the last couple days.

There are many ways we play into the devil's hand. But what I am most worried about right now is listening to faithless and worthless thoughts. Last I checked, God has made US the "master of our ships". We are not to be convinced otherwise. Our agency is what makes or breaks our lives. We have been given a ship to guide through many things and we ought to do it well.

One of the things I discuss over and over with my 3rd graders is having a plan for the future. It is not good enough to do well in 3rd grade, it is more important to develop habits that will bring success and happiness beyond 3rd grade. The same is true for us now and at any time in our lives. It is good to be happy and successful now. But what about tomorrow? Are we making plans and preparing our futures? Do we have goals to achieve that we actually care about?

I was struggling in education last year. I knew I had been directed to education for a reason, but I was not really very motivated. I wasn't happy with it.

Then a blessing was received. The blessing didn't "cure" me, but it did give me the insight I needed. I was told my hand was on the door, but I needed to open it.

I figured out quickly several ways to open it. To stop settling for mediocrity was number one. I was going to be one of the best. Not in an entirely competitive way, but nobody was going to have a right to say I wasn't trying. I also enrolled in the Master's Program for Administration at SUU. These two things gave me some direction I needed. I am now excited about my future as a teacher and educator. I love my students as always, in fact since taking some steps forward, I love them even more.

The decision to move forward optimistically has also helped my family. Since I made these decisions, the Lord has poured out blessing on our family. We were able to purchase a home. The money for education somehow became available and we are happy. We are not without trials, but I believe that there is hope, peace and optimism underlying our lives. This is what I want more than anything: to have a home of peace, happiness, and righteousness. Jenna and I are doing our best.

Now. The title is playing into the devil's hand. I put this because before all of these good things happened in my life, there was opposition and struggle. There were negative thoughts that I kept listening to that said I wasn't ready to do my Masters Degree. It would be too stressful, I needed more rest. There were voices saying that buying a home would be to hard. In fact at one point I almost decided against it, however, I thought came that said in essence, "Just keep going." Meaning with the house, so we did. We didn't quit half way. I am a firm believer in the principal of going forward. If we are prayerful and humble, the Lord won't lead us astray. If a bad situation is on the horizon, He will lead us around it. If we listen with faith.

Not going forward with something good we have begun (school, marriage, church callings, career, even vacation plans, etc.) is kind of like planting the seed, getting a good, healthy sprout, and then deciding to pull it out because "it might die", or "what if I get a lot of weeds", (Then pull the weeds..), or "what if whatever, blah, blah, blah". Excuses, we're all good at them. But listening to them plays into the devil's hand.

In marriage and career, in family at home, in civic and church, there is opposition. There are times where the negative seems to overwhelm and we wonder what the point is.

Well. The point is that God and Jesus are real. That our temple sealings are real. That our families can be eternal. Quitting anywhere along this path is quitting. God won't take our blessings away. By quitting, we are giving them back. Getting through the rough spots with spouses, children, co-workers, and others is what really makes us happy. We become something better than what we were before. We grow in love. But love can't grow if we quit.

God and all his promises are real. I want those blessings. Satan may try to convince us that they aren't worth it. But seeing as all of us have had these goals for millenia before this life...wouldn't we be pretty disappointed with ourselves when we return and realize that we sold our dreams for a "mess of pottage" or gave them up because we had a few hard weeks or even years? God will get us through.

Like I say to my students, "I'd rather be a loser, than a quitter."

Happy Mother's Day 2010

Well, it's coming up to Mother's Day again and I feel a desire to give out a couple tributes.
First of all I need to tell my own mother, Julia, how great she is. She has constantly been an example to myself and my siblings. She has always tried her hardest to teach us what is right and wrong and to show us. She listened to us through our growing up years and guided us to make good decisions. She also puts up with all our weirdness and teasing. I am grateful I can still go by and always feel welcome no matter when we come by. I am glad we are only an hour away from Cedar so we can still be close to Mom and Dad. My mother is a great mother. From taking care of aging grandparents to bringing in those in need for food and shelter, she is an example of Christlike service.
Secondly, I need to say Happy Mother's Day to Jenna. She is an amazing woman. Not only does she put up with me as my wife, but she is a great mother to Dallin and Allison. She has natural instincts to bless the lives of others that she is always acting on. She is always finding activities for our children to help their minds grow and develop. She teaches them the gospel and reads them stories. She combs and does their hair and makes sure they are clean and groomed. She puts our children first and foremost. She cooks their food and cleans their messes. She is out showing them how to serve our neighbors and friends. I believe that my wife is the pinnacle of womanhood and motherhood and will only grow, increase, and get better as we grow older together.
I am grateful for Jenna and my own mother, in a lot of ways Jenna has mothered me, and I know I need it! She soothes my mind when it is troubled. She keeps me pushing forward with my goals and dreams. She shows me a good example of how to treat my brothers and sisters.
Yeah, I am bragging a bit on my wife. But, I think she deserves it and I am very proud of her!
Happy Mother's Day honey!

Elder Packer's Talk

I was reading Elder Packer's talk on Priesthood this morning. It is very powerful. I would recommend it to everyone. It really explains the purpose of priesthood in the home. He quotes President Joseph F. Smith:
President Joseph F. Smith made this statement about the priesthood in the home: “In the home the presiding authority is always vested in the father, and in all home affairs and family matters there is no other authority paramount. To illustrate this principle, a single incident will perhaps suffice. It sometimes happens that the elders are called in to administer to the members of a family. Among these elders there may be presidents of stakes, apostles, or even members of the first presidency of the Church. It is not proper under these circumstances for the father to stand back and expect the elders to direct the administration of this important ordinance. The father is there. It is his right and it is his duty to preside. He should select the one who is to administer the oil, and the one who is to be mouth in prayer, and he should not feel that because there are present presiding authorities in the Church that he is therefore divested of his rights to direct the administration of that blessing of the gospel in his home. (If the father be absent, the mother should request the presiding authority present to take charge.) The father presides at the table, at prayer, and gives general directions relating to his family life whoever may be present.”
I really liked also that it was essential for the women to understand the father's role so they could support him. I know myself that having Jenna's support in doing my duty helps me along. I married a great women who is confident in helping me and in fulfilling her own responsibilities.
Near the end he has this statement:
Every law and principle and power, every belief, every ordinance and ordination, every covenant, every sermon and every sacrament, every counsel and correction, the sealings, the calls, the releases, the service—all these have as their ultimate purpose the perfection of the individual and the family, for the Lord has said, “This is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”
-President Boyd K. Packer
President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
It puts a good perspective for me on how all the activities that happen in the church are for out benefit and for the improvement of priesthood power in the home. Even the releases teach us something.
I am very grateful for Elder Packer and his lifetime of gospel instruction. He really has a way of explaining things that makes them understandable. Our Apostles and other leaders are there to help and support us. I am grateful for that guidance. I know they are in tune with the Lord and his Spirit. I know that the Lord's plan revolves around our families...and I love my family!

Growing

Sorry about the profanity in the picture...
If you'll look closely I DO have the scriptures in my other arm.
I was looking at this picture today, rummaging through some old materials/pictures, and thought it very fitting for my time of life.
It seems that we experience rapid spiritual growth in our youth, experience a lot of success, and we move step by step toward our goal of Celestial Marriage, the crowning ordinance we partake in in this life.
After this step...we continue to grow and progress, but the principle of enduring to the end really comes into play. In 2 Nephi 31:20 we read: Wherefore, ye must press forward with a ^asteadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of ^bhope, and a ^clove of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and ^dendure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have ^eeternal life. (Lds.org)
I must be honest. During the not so good moments when I am changing a diaper (not near as often as Jenna), holding a crying baby, sending a boy to his room for time-out, doing baths, driving to work, and feeling like I am teaching the same lesson over and over again, worrying about how my students are going to turn out, I start to wonder what the heck is happening and where the progress is going to come from.
It seems to be in the midst of all these hum-drum, day to day things, when I start wondering if I am doing what I am supposed to do.
Thank the Lord for the ability to look back.
I see how much more patient I am with my children. I see how much more I appreciate and love my beautiful wife. I see how much I have improved as a teacher and in my relationship with my students. I see how my faith in the Lord has increased and my knowledge that he will support and sustain me and my family through tough times.
Perhaps a little more time looking back and seeing the growth we have all made as we strive on our journey back to God will lighten our spirits and allow us to feel hope for the future. It will also increase the faith we have in our Father's plan to get us back to him.
So, as I go through some more "hum-drum" in the coming years, I will do my best to cherish my wife, enjoy the little moments with my growing and never getting younger children, take extra care of them and the students I have and have had stewardship for, and thank the Lord for each day and the challenges that come. Those challenges bring growth and there really are just so many days for each of us and we ought to do our best to enjoy them all.
When I look back on the time since I have been married and had children, I really have grown...dangit.

Christmastime Thoughts (along with House Purchasing Thoughts...)

Once again it has been way to long since my last post, but I have a good excuse...ish. The move! It was crazy and stressful. Thankfully it is over and the last few weeks have been relatively nice and smooth.
One problem with all the stress is that I was having a really hard time focusing on the time of year.
Since things have calmed down, I have really found a great appreciation for Christmas time. School, while a little crazy the weeks after Thanksgiving, was really fun due to the excitement in the air for the holidays. Nothing can energize me like students who are young and excited. I really love the students I have in my class and those from previous years who stop in and visit. It seems that around Christmas time those students are more prone to stop in and say hello. I can't describe how happy it makes me when someone I have invested time and thought into stops by to say hello and chat for a minute.
At home things have been really fun. Our new home here in Orderville has turned out quite nice. There was some crazy remodel work and two days that were insane. I can't say it was all bad though. I did lose about 10 pounds in two weeks. Hopefully I'll keep that off! It was also fun knowing that because we own the home we can make any changes that we see fit. Of course if any thing goes wrong we have to be responsible for that also!
Having our own home around Christmas has been a great experience. As much as we have more responsibility as homeowners we also have more freedom attached. I have noticed that as we move through the stages of life and take on more responsibilities our "talents" increase and the Lord gives us more. He give line upon line in earthly responsibilities as well as in knowledge. Having these earthly items (homes, cars, bills, etc.) teaches us how to organize ourselves. While there is organization that must happen, these responsibilities add to our joy. This is something that has been impressed on me lately. The Lord states in D&C 111:11, " Therefore, be ye as ^awise as serpents and yet without ^bsin; and I will order all things for your ^cgood, as fast as ye are able to receive them." (lds.org) I really like this scripture. As we are wise and stay out of sin, the Lord will "order" things for us. To me this releases a lot of stress in my life. I do my part, the Lord prepares things for me. This requires that I wait on His time table, but if I can trust Him by waiting on him and doing my duty, He'll open the doors for us when we are ready. He determines that readiness! Not us.
Anyway. I say all this because the house worked out so well for Jenna and I. Jenna did do much of the work, and I am grateful for that, but things worked so smoothly that it could be nothing but a miracle.
Well, anywho, our family is doing really well. Our kids are healthy and happy. With the Christmas break I get to spend a lot more time with Jenna, Dallin, and Allison and that is so much fun. Allison is really developing a funny personality and can be so much fun. Of course she is MY little girl! Jenna and I are excited to treat them to a fun Christmas with family and friends. I am glad to spend more time with Jenna! After the stress of our move we need the time together! She has been really good during everything AND she always finds good ways to make the holidays enjoyable.
I hope everyone's holidays are full of joy. I also hope we get a chance to reflect on the Savior and his blessings in each of our lives. I am sure we will. Merry Christmas!

Faith and Trust pt. 2

So. How's it going? It has really been a while. If blogging was a religion, I would be inactive. Thankfully it is not. I don't have any real reason for not blogging lately, just that I haven't. I would say laziness, but I don't think that would be completely accurate (It could be related to Mario...) ANYWAY!
Our family is doing really well. Our kids have had their bout with the "flu". Jenna is doing such a good job with them as a mother. She is great, I married very well. I am grateful I listened to the Lord and my dad. Of course it was my decision, but I know I didn't do it alone. I don't think I would have been as happy if I had.
We have been pretty busy with the house purchasing process lately. It has worked out so well that it can only be the hand of the Lord. I got some information at school about USDA loans for rural development, typed a few things into the internet, was contacted by some of the workers of this place. Had a house here in mind and it has just flowed. One of the other things is that this home we are buying just fell into our laps. It is too perfect to have been anything other than divine assistance. I know the Lord has a sense of timing and blesses us according to our readiness to progress. I had been holding back on a lot of things until this summer, and when I finally decided to commit to getting my Master's degree in Educational Leadership and get really organized in my teaching, things started to fall into place.
It is interesting that the blessings didn't come until a certain time. I really believe in the time table of the Lord. We often in our human impatience try to rush things along. If we will but trust the Lord, we would avoid a lot of our mistakes. Frustration can lead us to rash decisions, rash judgments and mistakes we would otherwise avoid. I don't believe the Lord creates stress for us, He is the one telling us to "trust in [him] with all our heart and lean not to our own understanding." (Prov. 3:5-6) If our hearts and lives are in order "all things shall work together for good to them that walk uprightly" (D&C 100:15). "Be still and know that I am God." (D&C 101:16).
It is interesting to me that we spend most of our lives stressing, when the Lord instead is telling us to "hold on thy way" (D&C 122:9) He wants us to continue down a strait and direct path. We know our goals. He knows our hearts. We go straight. We aren't to be troubled. D&C 123:17 is one of my favorites: "Therefore dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God and for his arm to be revealed." (emphasis added)
These are a few things I have learned the hard way, but I feel like maybe I am starting to learn them. It is a long journey for all of us, and I believe that the journey is to teach us to become like God. It is a training, a lesson, a class, and a test. All the different events we face, worldly pressures, oppositions, doubts, buffetings, and fears are to "prove [us] to see if we will do all things whatsoever the Lord [our] God shall command [us]." (Abraham 3:25) I am not saying I pass every test. I fail quite often, but I have seen that when I doubt or fear things pass me by. It happened to Oliver Cowdery. He was counseled in D&C 6:36, "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." Oliver was told in D&C 8:10, "Remember that without faith you can do nothing; therefore ask in faith". Oliver didn't prepare or exercise enough therefore when the time to translate came...he couldn't do it. D&C 9:11 says it clearly, "Behold, it was expedient when you commenced; but you feared, and the time is past, and it is not expedient now." Oliver missed an opportunity for a blessing due to his fear and lack of preparation.
I am not condemning Oliver Cowdery for this, for in his experience I have seen myself many, many times. Opportunities waiting for me and my family that I didn't take because I didn't prepare and I doubted. I know I am not alone in this.
There was a point with this house where I was about to do like I usually did and say, "Well, maybe we should wait." But then I felt strongly, even though I was tempted to quit, that I should see the process through and see what happens. I guess I had to exercise a little faith. Things are working for our good. Things are being provided as we move forward. The Lord wants our family to have a home. We want to serve the Lord in this area as much as possible. We are not perfect in this, but we desire it. I know the Lord blesses us for that, and makes up for our weakness. God is sure. He is constant. If he promises, it will come to pass. His time table is perfect for us. If we will make the steps to improve ourselves, to do the "hard" things, life will become easier. Because we will know in "whom [we] have trusted" (2 Nephi 4:19) and when we know that God will NOT let us down, we will no longer fear.